To Serve Is To Love

Do you know how good it feels to serve someone else? Not in a slavery-abusive type situation, that's not cool, but when you willingly give of yourself to take care of someone else's needs?


Let's look at some etymology real quick.
My name is Alexandra, a Hebrew feminine version of the name Alexander. The name means "defender/helper of mankind."

Helper of mankind. Well, that's quite the load, isn't it?

That being said, I have tried to live my life with a servant's heart and to help people as best as I can. The best part of this? My husband's top love language is Acts of Service.


One of the most loving things I can do for my husband is to clean up a little, or have dinner made when he gets home; simply taking care of a task for him so he doesn't have to worry about it is all I need to do.

It's not easy, and sometimes I just don't wanna get off the couch. I'm not perfect at this love language by any means! But when I put a little bit of effort in towards it, it goes a long way.

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Something I'm working on for myself, however, is how to accept someone else's acts of service towards me. My brain sort of goes "But wait, I'm the helper! I take care of YOU, not the other way around.... how could I ever ask for help?"

I'm taking it in small steps, for sure. They always say you can't truly love other people unless you love yourself, and that counts for self-care/asking for help too, I think. I'm still pretty independent, and usually just take care of my things myself. But here are some ways I am working on letting other people serve me like I want to serve them:

*Asking for a workout buddy to join me at the gym (I also love Fitbit challenges! Add me!)

*Texting a friend a seemingly stupid question because I need to lower my pride and actually figure out the answer

*Calling my husband when I'm upset and just listening to his voice to cheer me up (this is sometimes hard for me because I don't want to bother him...but merely hearing him helps me SO much)

*Asking my husband to help me with a task

*Asking a friend for advice (also hard: I have to admit that I don't know how to handle something that  I feel I should already know how to)

*Actually inviting someone to just hang out- this may not seem like a normal "act of service," but it is a really huge step for me right now



What are your favorite ways to help someone?
What ways can you ask someone to help you?
Both are important!



xoxo,
Alexandra Anne

Quality Time #LoveBlog

Today's topic for #loveblog is Quality Time! One of my absolute favorites :)



The definition of quality time is as follows:

 qual·i·ty time

noun

1.      time spent in giving another person one's undivided attention in order to strengthen a relationship, especially with reference to working parents and their child or children.

I used to think that quality time could only be spent in person, but that was widely false; as a master (mistress??) of long distance relationships/friendships, I have learned that quality time can be spent in so many situations! Technically, I don't even have to be in direct contact with someone to give them quality time.


When I test for the Five Love Languages, gift giving is my lowest love language. However, I appreciate gifts oh so very much because I know the time that went into the gift and into getting to know me (and also the time to work to earn money for it!).


If my husband and I apart, we can still spend quality time together with phone calls, skype, texting, and even online gaming together (sadly, my gaming computer is at home with him this semester, so during the week I can't do that...alas!).


In person, we also like to game together whether it's on a tabletop or on our computers or on a console while snuggled on the couch in the living room.

(pictures taken from pinterest) 

Quality time isn't just doing activities together either. Sometimes, for me, the time is spent being near each other while accomplishing different tasks, but still taking breaks as needed for eye contact or kisses etc. (If you cuddle while on laptops, it is a risk you take that the laptop will be thrown to the ground to make way for more cuddles!)


When I am far away from my husband, though, the best quality time is when he calls me to check on me and tell me he loves me. That's what gets me through the day, hearing his loving voice.


All of this can be applied to friendships too! (Except the kisses part, then you've gone beyond friends of course) I am so happy when a friend wants to skype, or we spend hours in conversation even if that is through text, that all applies to quality time and fills my love tank. I think the reason conversation works for me so much is because it's tied to another one of my favorite love languages, Words of Affirmation, but that'll be for a later post ;)

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What are your top love languages?
How do you define quality time?


xoxo,
Alexandra Anne

Love Languages- Receiving Gifts #LoveBlog

Hi there!

Today's #LoveBlog linkup topic is about one of the 5 Love Languages; today's love language is "Receiving Gifts."


Now, if you don't know about the 5 Love Languages, I highly recommend you read THIS book, AND you can go to their website and take the online quiz and find out what love languages are most important to you (they're all important to a certain extent, but we all have different ways that we feel most loved and how we like to love others)

Funnily enough, receiving gifts has always been my lowest score on my love languages quiz. I don't consider myself to be a material person, and I know what it's like to have holidays come up and neither you or your significant other have spending money for frivolous gift giving. For me, I am appreciative of gifts because it shows the other person spent time to get it, time to figure out what I would like, and possibly time making it! Quality time is a higher love language on my list, so that's how I interpret gifts. 

That being said, I love guessing what present I'm going to get if it's my birthday or Christmas (especially when you see your present under the tree and you try to figure out what it is based on the size and weight and box shape; my Dad calls me "Girl who likes to know," so that probably plays into that!). I also love giving a gift if I know the recipient is going to absolutely love it! I like taking the time to find them the perfect gift. 

Do you like making homemade gifts? Check out this link I found on pinterest! https://www.pinterest.com/pin/133067363967576902/ 

Let me know what your top love language(s) are! (You can have more than one haha it's pretty cool)

xoxo,
Alexandra Anne