Monday, February 8, 2016

National Marriage Week #LoveBlog

Phew! What a crazy weekend! I had a recital, a quiz, a newlywed bridal shower, and drove up and down the state all within three days, eek! But I'm back to my laptop now, on my comfy couch drinking some pinot grigio (a la Ramona Singer, because let's face it, we all wish we could get away with being THAT blunt) and I'm ready to write my heart away :)

Today's topic is on MARRIAGE, because it is national marriage week, how cool??!? I'm pretty excited just because I am currently LOVING my new marriage (we hit four weeks on Saturday, seriously brand new) and can't wait to celebrate Valentine's weekend with my hubby.

I have my sarcastic moments and views of cynicism on life sometimes, but I have pretty much always been a fan of marriage. There was only one point in my life where I had a big pout and thought I would never have kids and probably never marry (it was a stupid bad breakup in high school, I was 17, so obviously the world was going to end). But a few months after that icky situation, Mister Right popped into my life, or back into rather. I had never been close to him, I just knew he existed from our circle of mutual friends and we hung out in group settings as acquaintances (we actually have a picture of the night we met!).

I was 14, he was 16, four years later we would become a couple! 

So, I hadn't talked to this guy in a year, and all of a sudden he messaged me on facebook. Behold, facebook has done something GOOD, because four years later we are husband and wife and falling more in love every single day :) We started dating a little bit after that facebook conversation and have been together ever since.

I am actually planning a post on how to get a husband, a sort of satire if you will, because many things in our relationship have not been conventional or the social norm, and that's kind of awesome to me. But for today's late post I will give y'all an idea of what my relationship has taught me, and what the beginnings of our marriage has taught me

*I don't believe in love at first sight. I believe in lust at first sight, but there is NO way you can know the important things about a person just by looking at them. Yes, you can gather some ideas based on inferring data, but I believe that you need to spend time with a person in all sorts of situations to know whether or not you love them or are in love with them.

*There is no actual schedule for love. This slightly contradicts the above point, but I think every relationship is different. I knew I loved Michael within just a few months, but I also knew that we had a long way to go before we could plan our lives together. We were just teens when we started dating, and I was in high school! But we knew very quickly that we were in love, and that love only grew deeper and truer as time grew on.

*Kissing isn't like the movies. First off, bodies are gross. Secondly, in movies they aren't really kissing, it's more like a mushing of upper lips together with a combo of some movement of faces from side to side.

*Long distance is completely doable- and anyone who says "the distance is just too hard" makes me reallllllly frustrated. If both parties are honest and loyal then long distance is definitely attainable. It is NOT easy and I know it's not for everyone, but if we can do it, so can you. (I also know we are super blessed to be able to visit each other frequently, even when we lived 12 hours apart we never have gone more than 45 days apart from each other, now it's more like we can't go 5 days apart!). Skype is a huge blessing, and so is unlimited text/calling. He didn't text when we first went out, and we couldn't have free phonecalls til 9pm, haha those days feel so long ago now!

*Living with a man is an adjustment, but it totally works when you are best friends. We work so well together in every situation, it made sense that we have adjusted to living together pretty well. There are learning curves occasionally, but we love to serve each other, so we are usually happy to take care of something around the apartment when the other person asks. It's the little things that make a great marriage. Also, waking up to cuddles with your best friend is so wonderful. I wish I could do that every day (I will after this semester, I just have to live alone during the week, but weekends are wonderful). Oh, and having a pet helps encourage more cuddles too! Our cat brings us together and brings us so much joy, and is way easier than having a human child which we won't be ready for for many years to come.

*It takes two to tango- If one person isn't fully committed to the relationship, it won't work. Hands down. You can try and try, and it just won't change, not long term anyway. I am so lucky that God put the right man in my life at the right time. I didn't think I would ever be with anyone ever again (dramatic, right? Ah, to be 17 again, let's not do that, okay? Okay). But Michael walked in and completely won me over and it all has been so natural and at the end of the day it isn't hard for me to love him.

1 comment:

  1. Congrats you crazy kids. Enjoy the honneymoon time, it is lovely. The one thing I've learned about marriage is that love and marriage are two different things and that love isn't always enough to weather "'till death..." communication and shared values are what's really important.